Greetings and salutations everyone!
For many, just being in school for an extended period of time really weighs down on you. For some, taking the workload and taking it without breaks really does impose a lot of stress on your person just to continue on each day. Now this isn't to say that the work is too hard, or that the content is too difficult.. Rather it can all just be so much to handle, that we can easily lose track of where we are and lose our motivation to continue on each and every day.
This is something that I've known personally and something I've been coping with a lot recently. My apologies in advance as well for this will be a fairly serious blog as opposed to the rest I've done in the past, so please bear with me.
School is tough, and that's not an understatement. Higher education is something that we're doing of our own free will, more or less at least, because we want better opportunity when it comes to the later portion of our life. Of course, this just adds on a whole new level of stress and troubles that will impact us overall, so it makes it fairly difficult to manage.
Student debt is constantly accruing, tests are always around every corner.. There's always something going on that can very well bring us down as quick as we'd try to get back up, and it's really rough. Like the last thing I want as a student is to crank out a large project only to have to work on an equally large project the next week, for four or more different classes.
Money always seems to be an issue whenever it comes to being a student as well, or if it's not then we either have support we're extremely thankful for, or are trying to manage a job to the side as well, which adds on a whole new level of stress and anxiety overall.
I was enrolled in four classes and working with my internship this past semester, yet halfway through I realized that I wouldn't be able to take them all and pass it all to the level that I wanted to. In the past I've juggled as much as six classes with my internship no problem, so what harm would only four classes be on myself?
Well the answer turned out to be that I lost my drive and motivation after all of this time that it made it extremely difficult to spring back like I have in the past. Hitting a hurdle is nothing new to me, however getting past it has always been something that has been getting harder and harder as time went on. I felt like my own enemy because on the days where I'd want to work on projects, it would only lead into laying down or sleeping for extensive periods of time because I had no motivation or drive to even get out of bed some days. All the while my class work was piling up more and more, I'd deny hanging out with my friends because I was under a constant state of feeling unwell, I'd succumb to skipping classes because I couldn't find enough reasons as to why it was worth it..
It wasn't until I had heard that a lot of my friends and professors were actually worried about me that I realized the weight of what has been happening and that only set in more dread as so many more projects have piled on, so much work left unfinished, etc...
It's the worst feeling in the world.
Anxiety, stress, depression.. They're certainly not uncommon, and there are so many articles, videos, and people out there every single day talking about the struggles of those that suffer from these, and many more that talk about trying to remedy such conditions, but they're not for everyone. These conditions come in a myriad of shapes, forms, and beings. There is no simple cure all, but gosh does it get really bad sometimes.
Overall I felt that I was not only failing my classes or other people, but I was failing myself as well. I'm in my last semester but this senioritis thing is really kicking my butt in regards to trying to keep on going..
But the point I'm getting at with all of this is, is that it's okay to have this happen to you.
I'm not saying that any of this is meant to happen, or that these things are normal for everyone, but rather that it's okay to not perform at your best and that it's okay to expect less because there's no way somebody could ask me or you to perform at your 100% all day, every day.
It's okay to struggle in college because college is a challenge to begin with. It's this major hurdle that we need to get through to reach our dreams.
It's okay to be sad because that's a normal human emotion and you need to be honest with yourself and with others instead of trying to convince yourself that this isn't supposed to happen. Believe me, I live with that on a regular basis. I can list off every way in the book on how I've tried to convince myself that it was just a phase and that this isn't normal, but it only made things exponentially worse.
It's okay for you to be in a rut because it's from there that we can recover. We can slowly pick ourselves back up and work with those around us to try and make the best of the current situation.
Whether it's just taking more time to cope, dropping a class or two, or doing something to encourage yourself to get out of your normal habits, then it's all fitting for what you need on your road to recovery.
It's okay to ask people for help. Your friends are friends for a reason and they don't want to see you suffer as much as you wouldn't want to see them so. If you don't want to confide in your friends, then maybe look for some manner of counselor or figure within your immediate area to just listen to your worries. Counselors in high school and college were great for this reason.
It's okay to ask your professors for help. You're their pupil and it's only fitting for you to ask them for assistance because that's what they're here for. Firstly they are your teacher, next they're here for guidance and to make sure that you're also able to handle what they are dishing out to us.
Finally, it's okay to be honest. I always worry about what I feel and how others perceive me because I'm afraid that if I let some of my true colors show, that I'll become a thorn in their sides or that I will only become a burden. My baggage is one for me to carry and under its' crushing weight did I think that I was the only one to bear this all. To this point I'm still adamant about this and I'm still not completely okay with opening my troubles up completely in an effort to recover.
But of course for some, it can really help to confide into someone what you're feeling and receive their input on what you can possibly do. Sometimes just talking really helps, where even if it's just you ranting about something affecting you, even that helps. Getting that little bit out there really can help because it's at that point where I don't feel completely and utterly alone with my problems and stresses.
I know not all of this will help everyone; there is no magic cure-all for this matter of situation.
But this is a very real thing that affects so many of us on a regular basis.
For those of you who have hit a similar situation to anything I've relayed so far, just know that everything will be okay regardless of how bleak it may seem for the time being. We're all in this together and we can all relate to one another in regards to matters such as this.
If you know someone who is under this situation, be there for them because being that friend that can be with them even in their lowest point is the thing that could be the thing they need to bounce back.
It all passes with time, some quicker than others. But sometimes time is just what we need to make the best of it.
Until next time,